The Soldier Next Door

As I slowly open my eyes, I am immediately struck by a pounding headache, and fuck does it hurt like a bitch. But that is not my concern, my concern is Ana, and as I look over at her, I am so fucking relieved that she is still there. Though still there how I do not now. So I abandon my seat in an instant and rush over to her side; as I open her door, her limp body falls out from the seat. My heart stops, and I cannot fucking breathe.

Fuck Ana!

There is a suffocating grip that takes hold of my heart. I can feel the tears start to trickle at the corner of my eyes. I begin to scream at the top of my voice.

His body is lifeless, his arms dangle to the ground, and his head falls loosely to the back. There is blood all over his face, but I cannot see where it is coming from. I cannot see any other wounds, but it does not mean that they are not there. Why is he not moving? The crash was not really that hard, but then again, Ana was not wearing his seat belt as I asked her to do.

I feel horror creep over me as I take her wrist to feel for a pulse. The realization sets in that there is not one. Then I put my ear against her chest. And as I begin CPR, I know that Ana’s heart is not beating at all. The world around me becomes blurry, and I feel a darkness that sets over me.

Then out of desperation, I furiously start pumping her chest harder. With every breath I give her, it feels as if my world starts to slip away. I cannot lose the woman that I love. Not now. Not ever. I am not giving up.

So I begin to slam my fist hard into her chest over and over. Every second I take a break, I lay my head against her chest, hoping that her heart was beating again. Everything seems to have gone dead quiet; all I can hear is the echo of my screams down the alleys and the open streets.

“Goddammit, Ana!”

I can only utter two words. It is goddamn terrifying.

Once I get her awake, she is getting every word from me. She will not give me such a damn fright again. Though fright is what is running through my mind as I am not able to get her to wake up.

I furiously shake her by the shoulders, then I lay my ear close to her lips again.

“Dammit, Trinity, please wake up! I am not losing you today! Please wake up!”

I slam my fists into his chest with as much force as my body can give. And every breath I give is longer than the one before. I plead and beg and give everything that I have.

“You listen to me, Ana; I am not letting you go. So please, I beg you, wake up!”

Then with the last bit, I have left, I slam hard, the hardest that I have done.

“Fuck Isabelle, please wake up.”

Nothing, I do not hear her breathing.

I slam into her chest…one…two…three times.

Nothing.

“Goddammit, Ana, wake up! You are not leaving me! Do you fucking understand me! Wake up!”

My voice echoes down the street, drawing the face of worried passerby to come to assist. But there is no way that I am allowing some stranger to come near her now. I do not trust any of these damn assholes, so much to their horror, I shout at the top of my voice again.

“Back the fuck up. Phone the ambulance, but don’t set your damn foot near me.”

And then.

One…two…three…slam.

Nothing.

“Come on, Ana, don’t do this.”

Then.

One…two…three…bang.

Nothing.

I furiously shake her body again. There is nothing. Ana is not moving.

I cry out in absolute agony and drop my body down onto her chest. Even now, still, I cannot feel her chest rise and fall the way that it is supposed to. Is she truly gone from me? Have I lost her? Where is the justice in love? How, how can you rip two people apart that are meant to be together?

It is not fucking fair!

Then.

I hear a loud gasp as the air fills her lungs again; it is the most beautiful noise that I have ever heard. And as I sit up to pull her into my arms, she sees a small tear running down my cheek.

“Why are you crying, soldier?”

“Because I thought I lost you.”

I envelope her frail body into my arms and gently press her head against my chest, “I love you, damn woman, don’t ever give me a fright like that again.”

Then she finds the gaze of my eyes, “What happened?”

“I don’t know, boo. Someone rammed us off the road.”

She only but frowns at me as she starts to rise from her feet, “Who would do such a thing?”

“I am not sure, but please sit down until the ambulance comes to see if you and the baby are fine.”

So with her gently in my arms and the ambulance approaching, I take my phone from my pocket and phone Gibbs. “We had an accident; please will you pick up Ana and me.”

“Shit, Ethan, are you guys okay?”

“Yes, but it was a close one.”

“Sure, I am on my way.”

With that, I drop the call and show for the ambulance driver to come to look at Ana. For what seems way too long, he checks for any major injuries and gives her something to calm down. The only thing that will calm me down is a double whiskey as soon as I know that she is safely back home.

So once the paramedic gives her the all-clear, we see Gibbs’s car coming up the road. Not much is said, as he knows that I am not a person to have a conversation with right now.

I have never in my life felt anything so raw with pain.

We soon find ourselves on the way back home. And as I am trying to get myself to a state of mind where I can talk to Gibbs and not blow up, Ana softly lays her hand on my arm.

“Soldier, everything is okay.”

“No, Ana, it is not okay; we need to get you home.”

Not wanting to fight with her, with the deepest affection that I hold in my heart for her, I take her hand and hold it so goddamn tight.

It does not take her long, and she bursts into tears so uncontrollably that I only but stings my heart.

This is fucking killing me.

With that, the agony that is hiding behind her voice burst into a waterfall of tears. If I ever thought I had not heard a woman cry, then Ana has shown me pain that you cannot compare. It rips your heart from your chest and slices apart. I have never felt this pain before.

Fucking never!

The raw passion to feel her takes over my body. I drop my gaze to her full and parted lips; I close my eyes for but a second, waiting for the hesitation to come. But there is no denying it as I return my eyes to her very own brown ones that are still filled with pain. With a look of heat in my eyes, so comes the lust and desire once again. It is undeniable. I know that once I kiss her, my resistance will crumble.

And yet, I know that it will be the only thing that will take her mind away. We came so fucking close to losing each other. I would have simply died a slow and painfully tormented death if Ana and the baby had to leave me behind to see the world in by myself.Property © of NôvelDrama.Org.

Not one goddamn minute am I ever going to let go of her again. Every day, every hour to the minute to the second, I will show her how grateful I am to have her in my life, but most of all, she needs to know that I will always love her.

So without thinking of fighting it any longer, I slide my hands down her waist and shift her closer. I pull her as deep as I can into my craving body. I feel her lean her body up against mine, completely closing any gap that existed before. I begin to lay smooth kisses against her delicate lips, rendering my body ever weaker than before. I know it should not do this, not now, but I want to give her hope; I want her to see that no matter what, we are still strong together. With just a few delicate touches, my warm lips fall on hers like cool raindrops on a hot summer’s day.

And then I pull away as we are approaching our driveway. While Ana goes inside to lay down, I stand outside with Gibbs for a few moments in privacy.

“Here,” I hand him my phone, “Here are the plates of the car. Please find out who is behind this.”