Want to Play A Game

As I wake up, I am still in shock that Matt kissed me the way he did. I am uncertain of reality between the both of us. The kiss made me feel like I was on cloud 9. It was so passionate, it filled me with a fire, I never felt before. I think that I enjoyed it more than what I should have. I barely know him. As I lay in bed, I pull the covers up over my head not ready for reality just yet.

As I scuffle around, I know I am going to have to face it sooner or later. It just felt so good so right. I think that’s what’s most terrifying about it. A feeling that I have never felt my entire life. Something that Jake never even made me feel. I need to get out of this bed and face what happened. It’s not like anything bad happened, I just don’t know how to react.

So I decide to get up and get out the bed. I go into my closet to find something to wear. I want to look attractive but I don’t want to look like I am trying too hard. I want him to watch me. I want him to look at me as I walk past him. I need him to crave me to want to touch me all over my body. I start to get wet just thinking about him. It’s not easy trying to control myself. I can’t help but crave him, god if he only knew the desire I feel for him.

Would he crave me the same? Why is my body reacting this way to him? I just wish these feelings would go away. I don’t want to feel this way towards him. I almost feel like it’s wrong to feel so dirty towards another person. Wanting to be introduced into his world wanting him to show me all that he can.

I’m finally dressed. I go look in the mirror brush my hair and pull it up in a ponytail. Then I change my mind and leave it down instead. I shine my lips up, I want him to notice them. I want to make him look twice and make him be the one to talk to me.

What will people think? I am not really sure and I really don’t care. I want to make this count. I want him to crave me and touch my body. I want him to lose control and just go for it. I’m going to allow him to do as he pleases to me.

I decide to go to Starbucks to get breakfast, I am hoping he sees me. As I opened the door looking down the hall, I see his door is shut. I walk the hall it doesn’t open as I pass he’s usually up. I am disappointed that he did not come out he probably didn’t realize that it was me that was leaving.

I make it to Starbucks and glance through the window before heading inside. I see him by himself sitting with no other woman. My body fills up with excitement. I cant wait to be in his presence. As I get to the counter to order my coffee. Someone gets in line behind me when I look back, it’s him. He put his hand on my shoulder it sends shivers through my entire body.

“Hello Jessica, let me get your coffee and whatever else you would like.”

It’s like I can’t say anything my mind is blank. His touch sends my whole body this numb feeling. With all my excitement, I bite my lip trying to control it. I know that he can tell that his touch makes me crazy and I know he likes it.

“Thank you so much Matt, I really appreciate you buying me breakfast.”

“Would you like to join me Jessica?”

“I would love to join you thank you for inviting me.”

My God he invited me to join him for breakfast. I am freaking out, I have to keep my cool. I can’t seem like a total fucking idiot. Nobody in their right mind falls for a person they haven’t even known very long. Even if I am head-over-heels for him. I guess it doesn’t mean that he actually needs to know that. In all reality you can’t fall for someone that quick, it’s just an obsession of mine. Here I go, overthinking every little detail because I am nervous as hell.

“Jessica you really look beautiful today. That outfit makes you look amazing.”

Mission accomplished! I wanted to make sure that whatever I wore would attract him and it did. That makes me very proud of myself.

“I smile at him, you don’t look so bad yourself.”

“So Jessica, what are your plans going to be for today?”

“I don’t have any plans just my day off work. I am just going to enjoy myself. What about you what kind of plans do you have today?”

“Well Jessica I was hoping to become a part of your plan for today and maybe tomorrow since your off work.”

I automatically start getting wet. The satisfaction of knowing that he wants to spend the day with me makes me crazy. What could I have that makes him want me. Not wanting to start anything new with the whole situation but I can’t help myself. Will I be able to control myself around him all alone? I don’t know. Do I really want to control myself is the question, I should be asking myself. I am trying to speak but it seems like the words just won’t come out of my mouth. I want to tell him yes, but I am afraid. Am I going to be able to be chill or will I want to devour him?

“What do you have in mind Matt?”

“Meet me on the roof of the apartment building once it is dark. I have to go but I will see you soon.”Please check at N/ôvel(D)rama.Org.

“Thank you for breakfast.”