Chapter 55 Coming back
The sound of my six-inch Chanel stiletto echoed through the busting halls of the topmost floor of the biggest and most renowned ship building company in the whole of Asia.
My black crossover halter bodycon dress clung to my body like it’s my second skin as I sauntered across the long hallway.
I ran my fingers through my short hair and stared impressed at the newly renovated place. I stopped in front of a portrait and could not contain my admiration.
“Wow. I never thought I could look this good in a painting,” I exclaimed when I took a closer look at it.
Before me is a magnificently made painting of myself dressed in a black gown. My hair is loose and I had that wicked mysterious look in my eyes while looking at the aperture. The painter perfectly captured my lost self some years ago.
I slowly turned to look at another portrait on the other side of the hallway. I blinked a few times and my heart seemed to melt at what I saw. The smile on my lips was sweet as I stared at my son’s painting.
“Aww, our cutie boy is so handsome here.”
I approached the picture and caressed the smiling face of my child who was very cute in his white polo and was wearing a very big smile on his lips.
I looked around. I didn’t see any other decorations. There are only two portraits of me and my son in the hallway and nothing else as if whoever put them there really wanted me and my son to be the only ones to get the attention of everyone who passes by.
“Not that I’m complaining. We both look so great here.”
I shrugged and opened the door at the end of the hallway.
“Cholo Gastrell,” I read the gold-plated name on the outside of the closed door. I smiled at myself and traced the letters of his name.
“Cholo Gastrell… Cholo Gastrell… Now that I think about it, your name indeed sounded like a dog’s name,” I said with a bit of a giggle remembering how Kristine pointed it out to me.
I turned the knob and pushed the door open. His female secretary immediately stood up from the desk and gave me a formal but surprised smile.
“Good afternoon, ma’am. Mr. Gastrell is currently inside his office,” she said stammering, the shock did not disappear from her face as if she had seen a ghost.
“Thank you, what’s your name, miss?”
She did not speak. I had to repeat the question to get an answer.
“I’m Denise Fyodor ma’am,” she said, trying to hide the stammering.
I gave her a friendly smile. “Long time no see, Denise. Nice name.”
I turned my back on Cholo’s still shocked secretary and didn’t even bother to knock and opened the door. The first thing that greeted me was the dark earth tone design of the whole room. The whole interior is cool to the eye which reminds me of an art exhibit I attended in South Africa. Calm, cool, and very pleasant to the eyes. Very minimalist style.
“Denise, I already told you that I don’t want anyone’s appointment for today. I don’t care who called you. Drop it now. Tell them I wouldn’t be disturbed for today. I have a very important event I need to go to today,” said the dark rich voice owned by the man I haven’t heard for years.
My eyes moved to the man behind the desk who was seriously focused on the papers while holding a Parker pen in the other hand. I stared at my ex-husband.
Five years had past and still he looked as handsome and as drop-dead as I left him to be. Few lines have been added to his face but instead of making him less of an attractive man, it only made him more ravishing.
It’s still as strong as before as if it will pull you.
It’s in the power he holds, the striking confidence he exudes. He is Cholo Gastrell for a reason.
I carefully closed the door and took off my sunglasses. I walked towards him and knocked on his wooden table.
“Are you so busy with your schedule that you can’t afford to at least have a one-minute talk with your ex-wife?”
I saw his muscles become rigid. His hand stopped moving and in a split of a second, his surprised eyes were on me checking if I was really real.
When our eyes met, it was as if I was transported back in time and memories that I had forced myself to forget for years. Our memories flashed before my eyes. Everything from the beginning until our very end.
After recovering, I gave my ex-husband a casual smile.
“Hello, Cholo. It’s great seeing you again after all these years. How are you?”
He did not answer. He just stared at me like he was kind of a precious stone. I laughed at his reaction and leaned over to tap his cheek.
“Hey, you alright? It’s like you saw a ghost there. It’s just me. Karina,” I softly laughed and sat on the seat in front of his desk and crossed my legs.
“You’re back,” he muttered after a few seconds of just staring at me without blinking.
“Yes, I do. And nothing has changed here in the past years. Traffic is still here. Well, the infrastructure is good. That’s a little bit better.”
I looked around his office and couldn’t help but be impressed by the art pieces on display.
“Nice collection,” I pointed out to the miniature sculptures in one corner.
I didn’t hear any reply from him so I looked at Cholo who I caught smiling while looking at me.
“I said it’s a nice collection. I think I’ve seen that phallic sculpture in a gallery in Australia if I’m not mistaken.”
He adjusted his tie and brushed his hair aside while keeping his eyes on me. He moved his eyes repeatedly for fear that I was just a product of his imagination and I might disappear at any second. I bet he is also shocked that we’re having this conversation right now.
“Yup. I got it from Adelaide. I took out a fortune just to get that one,” he answered as if he had been haunted and couldn’t believe that I was really in front of him after blinking a few times.
“Phallic figures. Hmmmm… What a nice hobby, eh?” I said, trying to elicit humor from him.
He bit it and laughed.
“Yeah. I got into collecting stuff these years. Ikaw… What did you do during…” He didn’t finish the sentence and instead asked a question. “Did you enjoy your travels?”
He removed his tie and cleared his throat after gulping the remaining half of his coffee.
I just smiled at his cute antics.
“So much. I think I’ve been to more than half of the countries in the world. It was a really good experience but it’s still different for you to return to the town of your birth. I do not know. It’s still different here. Maybe there’s something in the air here.”
“Right,” he concurred.
I smiled at him and he smiled back at me with subdued longing in his eyes, the kind that is overpowering it shows on his whole face but can do nothing and can act nothing about it.
“You still like black?” he said and motioned at my dress.
“Yeah and you still wear our wedding ring?” I pointed to the ring on his finger.
He looked down at his own hand and smiled. “Yeah, I still do. It’s a big help especially when I’m surrounded by female entities who only want to chase me because of my good looks. I just have to proudly show it to them and boom, I’m as free as a bird.”
I chuckled and moved away from his gaze.
“Nice. Now, I have become a scapegoat.”
He just smiled and kept on staring at me as if he still cannot believe that I’m in front of him and we’re talking as if there’s no years between us.
“Why are you here, Karina?”
“How are you, Cholo?”
We asked each other in unison after a few moments of silence.
“I’m good. Just good. How about you?” he briefly asked, hinting that he eagerly wanted to know my answer to his previous question.
“I’m good, too. Never felt this better. As for your question, I’m here to ask you about something.”
The joy disappeared from my face and was replaced by a hesitant smile. I’ve been practicing what to say for a few days but now I feel blank.
“You traveled all the way here just to ask me a question? You could have just called me.”
I heaved a sigh.
“I can’t tell on the call and you know I’m not calling you. I need to be here. I need to see you just so I could have an answer.”
I paused and looked right into his eyes.
“I’m here to ask you if your promise still stands. I… I was hoping your promise still stands.”
I stopped to fill my lungs with air as he waited for me to say it.
“Are you still into me, Cholo?” I asked softly.
It was as if the world stopped spinning while I waited for his answer. Everything around us seems to have disappeared. We were the only two left, silent, and both waiting for the next events.
“I’m a Gastrell, Karina. I stand by my promises. The last time I didn’t, the results are unforgivable and the consequences are irreconcilable. If I could have it my way, we would not be talking now. I’d let my hands and lips do the talking,” he answered, his hands tightly clasped on the table while sadness was visible in his eyes.
I smiled at what he said. A blush appeared on my face. “Then why are we still talking? We’re just wasting our time. Do what you want with me.”
“If I didn’t have strong restraint, I might have jumped on you there a second you walked inside my office,” he said in a voice that was still trying to fight what his eyes were saying.
“Then do it. No one’s stopping you,” I said, confused about what he meant. But he shook his head.
“No, don’t tempt me, Karina. You just don’t know how much self-control I’m doing now to not grab you. Five years… I’ve endured five years of not seeing and bothering you in person . I ain’t gonna break the promise I made to you. I will leave you in peace. I will let you be, Karina. One touch. One touch is all it takes from you and I will be down on my knees again silently begging for you to stay. I can’t do that now… now that I’ve seen how happy and fulfilled you are without me. It’s enough for me to see you now. I’m okay with that.”
Tears welled up in my eyes. I know all of those, how he let me go without question. I know he didn’t let me go because he didn’t love me anymore. He did it out of his own will because until now, he is still living in guilt froml the past.
“Yes… I am happy now but I am selfish too. I know I will be happier with you, Cholo. I lied to myself when I said that it will be a goodbye. I still love you. Do you still love me? Do you still want me back? Do you already have anyone? Am I too late? It’s okay. You can tell me. I am just taking chances here.”
“No, no. You know I want you. I will always want you. Forever. I did not stop loving you,” he passionately promised.
My eyes burned from what I heard.
“Then why are you still sitting there? Why aren’t you hugging and kissing me? Come on.”
I held out my hand to him. “Come on.”
He just looked at my hand and didn’t move as if contemplating if I was really telling the truth. It’s like his heart and brain are still arguing about what to do. I couldn’t help myself anymore so I stood up, rolled over to his chair and cupped his face so that our lips met. Although shocked by what I did, his hand easily supported my waist and carefully turned me so that I could sit on his thigh.
The moment our lips met, I knew then that coming back was the best decision I have ever made. The few years we’ve been apart is enough to me. I have done what I want. I have found myself and I have forgiven. It’s time for me to be completely happy with the only man who can make me.
I am choosing to go back.
I am choosing my happiness.
I am choosing Cholo.
I am choosing us over anything else in this world.
“The Cholo I know is not a coward. Seems like the years have not been that good to you,” I teased him.
His mouth curved into a smirk before his hand went into my nape and pulled me to him.
“I am only like this because of you,” he whispered and completely covered my mouth again.
The pent-up heat exploded. I responded as wild as his tongue in my mouth. I molded into his arms as I melted into his kisses and touch.
“You’re the only one who made me feel this way, Karina. It’s crazy. Those years without you by my side made me lose my sanity. But every time I look into your uploaded pictures where I see you smiling and living the best out of your life, all my sadness disappears because I can see you happy. It’s more than enough because it’s heaven for me to finally see the comeback of your genuine smile which you are wearing now,” he said in a little bit of a throaty timbre.
He traced my lips with his trembling hand, sadness is still not leaving his eyes. “Why did you come back to me? Karina, I caused you so much pain. I don’t deserve your love at all.”
I bit my lip as my years of accumulated tears began to form. I raised my face and gently held his face in my palm.
“Five years ago, you told me to promise you that I’ll live my life to the fullest. That I should love, smile, go to places, take pictures. Be carefree. You told me to enjoy everything… to be free. I did all of that. I traveled the world to experience things. I laughed with people, went to places but when it’s time to go home, I always feel like I don’t belong anywhere else in the world but by your side. You told me that you will wait for me… but at the back of my mind, I doubt if there is really someone who can wait for such a long time.”
“Is that why you asked for an annulment?”
“Yes, because I want you to be free from me, Cholo. I don’t want to lock you in an uncertain relationship because I decided at first not to go back to you. Anyway, what can I do? I still love you. You’re still the one I’m looking for. Last month, I dreamed of Errol. He was smiling at me and then my father and brother appeared saying they missed me. And I took it as a sign that it’s time to go back home and see if the application for being your Mrs. Gastrell is still vacant. I came back because I love you, Cholo. The heart knows what it wants. Mine knows you so much. It’s screaming your name over and over again.”
His face suddenly brightened. His eyes were red as he caged me in his embrace. I closed my eyes and let my own go along with Cholo’s silent tears. His shoulders moved so I hugged him even tighter.
I caressed his back and sobbed silently.C0pyright © 2024 Nôv)(elDrama.Org.
“You know I would not be able to love another woman again if it’s not you. You know that. I did not fail to remind you in every gift card I sent you on your birthday,” he whispered in a broken voice.
“I know. I get all that. So that’s what I held onto when I came back. You promised me so now you really have to keep that.”
I held him by the shoulders and stared at his wet face.
“Prepare a space in your heart and in your life because I’ve come back. I’ve come back to you, Cholo.”
He wiped my tears and kissed my head.
“Karina, that space you are asking for has been empty for years waiting for you my love to fill it again.”
He cupped my face and just stared at me.
“Ah, I can’t believe you’re really here now. That I can get to hold you like this again. Kiss you, own you. Are you really real? Are you really here with me? Are you really sure about this? Are you mine again?”
I felt like crying again while looking at his hopeful eyes.
“I am yours to begin with. And yo-“”
He cut right into my words to kiss me again and this time I felt his pain, desperation, and love. I tasted his warm tears while his cold shaking hands are both on my cheeks.
“God, I miss you so much, Karina. I miss you so much, wife.”
He caressed my cheek and let his tears fall.
“I love you so much, Karina. I love you with all of me, wife. Thank you so much for coming back and for giving me another chance. From now on, let me show you the kind of love and devotion that you deserve. Thank you, Karina. Thank you so much.”
I nodded and hugged him feeling for the first time the peace and contentment that I have always longed for.
We stayed like that for some time, just hugging, kissing, feeling each other’s presence, telling stories, trying to bridge the gap of distance and time.
“I’m planning to visit Errol today,” he said while brushing my hair with his fingers.
I looked up at him and smiled. He responded by kissing my lips.
“Let’s go together.”
He nodded and smiled at me. “Let’s go home?” he asked after he stood up and offered his hand to me.
I stared at his hand and remembered the last time he did the same to me. I stood up and reached for his hand. He held me tightly and squeezed it.
“Yes, I’d love to go home, now.”
Together, we walked out of his office holding hands and wearing the best smiles on our faces while hoping that this time, it will be forever.