Chapter 18: leave me alone
Chapter 18: leave me alone
Aleera's POV
I opened my eyes slowly and my head felt so heavy because every move I did felt like I was going to pass out again. I moved my head to the left slowly and found Darius sleeping in one of my armchairs. Has he been here all night? He must have because he has the same clothing on as he did yesterday. As I tried to sit up I felt a sharp pain in the area when I punched in the glass piece yesterday.
I took off my duvet to do some inspections on my wound when I found a bloody bandage on. I sighed and pulled the duvet back on because I got cold when I took it off. I looked at Darius again and called out to him.
"Darius, wake up,"
Darius woke up after I called for him once. He got up from the armchair and came over to me in a flash.
"Alea, how do you feel? Are you in any pain?" He asked. I could hear the worry for me in his voice too.
"Yes, I am fine. I just feel some pain here.” I pointed to my stomach. “By the way, why were you sleeping in here and not in your own bedroom?" I asked him. Copyright by Nôv/elDrama.Org.
Darius reached out his hand and took mine as he looked straight into my eyes.
"Do you really think I would not stay here after you drove a glass piece into your stomach yesterday?" He answered back and then he took a deep breath. I could see he was upset. I noticed he was calm again and he continued.
"Do you have any idea how scared I was? I almost lost you again. You can't keep doing this to yourself or to me. I can't and I won't live without you." He said with a sad tone and he looked down after.
I took my hand away from his and he brought his eyes up to meet mine. "I can never give what you want. I am too broken and can never be put back together again. You deserve a woman that can love you and be with you the second you meet each other." I said trying to hold back the broken tone and my tears.
"And I will make you whole again. I am here for you if you need to talk or have a shoulder to cry on. I want you and no one else. If I need to wait years for you to accept my love then fine I will wait."
"I am not ready for it. I don't know if I ever will be or if I even want it, so please stop talking about love. Can you please leave me alone?"
"Fine I can stop talking about love for now but I am not going to leave you alone, not until I know for sure that your suicidal behavior is gone." He said back and he had a firm tone.
"Excuse me. What?" I said in a shocked voice
"You heard me. After what you did yesterday I have decided that you will no longer be alone and that is final." He said back to me and now I was even more shocked.
"You can't do this to me. I refuse to be a prisoner again." I said back to him. Now I'm pissed off.
"You can go wherever you want as long as someone is with you all the time, and you are not my prisoner, you are my mate. And what do you mean by a prisoner again?" He asked me concerned. Why did I say that to him? Now he knows that I have been a prisoner.
"Nothing that concerns you. Just get out and leave me alone. I don't want any of you near me." I said back to him. I turned my head away from him and pushed myself off the bed, it hurt like hell. At lightning speed Darius was by my side and he grabbed my arm and turned me around so I had to face him.
"Of course it concerns me. You are my mate and I don't want you to deal with your past alone. You need to talk to me or to someone." He said back to me and I don't know what came over me. I could not stop myself before my hand came in contact with his cheek. When it had sunken in what I did, I screamed at him.
"GET OUT AND LEAVE ME ALONE!"
He was so shocked and he moved his hand up to his cheek to touch it. It was red and sore. His eyes met mine and I could see that his eyes had turned pitch black, he was angry, but instead of hitting me or screaming at me he stormed out from the room leaving me alone. After he left I felt bad for him. What did I do? He has done nothing bad to me since he saved me from my father and his pack. But he did put pressure on me to tell him. If he only knew how scared I was to be around him. I had never had a good relationship with any man and what will he do or think about me if I tell him about my past?
I slid down the wall to sit on the floor. I didn’t care that my wound hurt like hell. I leaned my head back to the wall and cried, not because of the pain I felt from my wound but for the wounds I felt inside. I have been through so much so I don't believe time would heal me or erase the bad memories from my past
'I've been alone all along. I am scared to open up, to let people know my childhood fears and the haunted dream I still have. How I can see their faces that still haunt my once pleasant dreams and won't leave me alone. This is driving me to madness. I know I can't stop the pain. What will happen if I open up? Will the pain slowly disappear? What should I do?'
Third POV
Darius left the house to go for a run to calm himself down. After he left the house he mind linked Celia and told her about what happened and that she should go up to Alea. When Celia was outside Alea's room she did not open it and she refused to, she screamed that she wanted to be left alone.
Celia tried over and over to get Alea to open up the door. She even brought lunch with her but she still refused to open the door.
When Darius came back after he had calmed down he also tried but she still refused. Sure they could force their way in but they wanted her to open the door to gain her trust and everything. Every time they tried she screamed out that she wanted to be alone, so the only thing they could do right now was to grant her wish and leave her alone so she could calm herself down. They knew as long she answered them by screaming they knew she was fine and had not done anything to herself.
Aleera was no longer sitting on the floor, she had moved around during these hours. At this moment she was sitting on her bed thinking to herself if she should keep it in or if she should tell him about her horrible past. She knew for sure that he would run away and leave her alone if she told him