Chapter 19
Chapter 19
Alessandro eyed her with irritation as she evaded his questions. ―You‘re changing the subject
―Yup She nodded as she took more of the risotto off his plate. ―You should try this, it‘s really good
―Tell me something Mackenna He ignored her instructions. ―When you almost died, did it not occur to you to come home to me?.
She held his serious gaze with one equally serious. ―Yes, Alessandro it did. Then one of the nurses thought she was doing me a good deed by bringing me reading material. You were on the front page of a glossy magazine with Dulce, and I remembered why it was I had left in the first place. You were doing a show with her in Japan, and I knew she would come ahead of me. There was no way I was going to set myself up for you to tell me you were too busy to come for me
―I would have come He argued.
―I was better then. It would have been no different than today. You would have said I was resting comfortably and left me to tend to her every want and desire. I come second to Dulce. Always have and always will
She saw his fingers clench around the butter knife in his hand and she glared at him. ―Don‘t deny it Alessandro. You couldn‘t last a full twenty–four hours without contact from her and she couldn‘t last without contact from you. She‘s the priority in your life and there is nothing you can say to make me change my mind
He was about to argue with her and then he stopped. He took a breath and looked away from her. ―You‘re right. I put too much of my time and effort into making Dulce the perfect representative for
my company and in doing so, I alienated the one person who meant more to me than anything else. If I could go back in time to fix it, Mackenna, I would but I cannot. I can only ask you to reconsider the divorce and give me a chance to be a better husband
His words struck her as if he‘d used his open hand to deliver a blow and she grappled with the knowledge he was admitting he‘d put the other woman ahead of her. She felt the bitter taste of bile rising in her throat. ―I don‘t think I can Alessandro. you can be a good husband is not something I‘m able to do
―What does that mean?. He was torn between hope and despair at her words.
―It means I don‘t believe you when you say you love me. I don‘t believe you when you say you didn‘t cheat on me, and it means I don‘t believe you when you say you want to try again The phone rang interrupting the moment, and she knew who it was, and she rose to answer it. She picked up the telephone and sat down on the edge of the sofa as she spoke into the receiver. ―Hello
She listened to Doctor Ingram confirm her suspicions and then she thanked him replacing the receiver before curling her legs up against her chest and tucked her chin to her knees. She stared blankly at the glossy cover of a magazine on the low table and felt the tears welling in her eyes, blurring her sight but she didn‘t try to wipe them and didn‘t try to hide them.
A small sob escaped her chest and she admitted she was torn between crying and hysterical laughter, and she whimpered as the pain in her chest grew.
Alessandro moved to sit beside her, worried by her reaction. ―Are you okay?” ―I‘m fine She sniffed as she pushed her hair off her face.
―The doctor?. He asked quietly as he rubbed her shoulder. ―Were you correct in your thoughts?.
―Yeah She couldn‘t look at him. The desire to throw her arms around his neck was mixed with wanting to bludgeon him with a blunt instrument. He had won. He had won the war because she knew she could not do the impossible and win the divorce now. It would destroy her. She was going to have to live with the knowledge for the rest of her life she was stuck married to a man who neither loved nor respected her enough to make his mistress go away.
She knew he was waiting, and she took a shaky breath. ―When I got sick, I was in the hospital for almost a month. Intensive care for ten days and then quarantined for four more and then I was still sick, and I spent two more weeks at home She was openly admitting she had downplayed her illness and lied about being back to her desk within a month. ―At the time, the only medications I was on was a birth
multi-vitamin. My period didn‘t change at all when I was in the hospital. It seems! outgrew the terrible stuff of my adolescence, and my hormones were normal. Since 1 didn‘t have anyone in my life, I opted not to bother taking them again
She gave a loud sniff as she reached for a tissue from the side table and blew her nose. ―I hadn‘t even realized until today I had skipped my period altogether She
felt his hand go still on her shoulder where he‘d been rubbing sympathetically.― Actually, I only realized it when I woke up from my nap. I had a dream,ǁ she choked on a sob, ―and in my dream you missed the birth of our first child to be with Dulce. I realized it wasn‘t so far of a stretch because it‘s probably what will happen but as soon as I woke up, I knew.”
Her voice was hoarse now as she tried to talk through the tears falling in a steady stream. ―All I wanted was to get my life back. I just wanted my self-respect back. Now, I‘ll never know what it will be like to look at myself in the mirror and not see the pathetic excuse for a woman my mother would be ashamed of looking back at her She turned to face him then. ―You won‘t let me go now, will you?.
―No,ǁ he said as he wondered if when her chest had hurt earlier if it felt anything remotely like the agony he now felt. ―If you are truly pregnant with my child, there will absolutely be no divorce
―I thought not Her lips twisted sadly. ―I have so many regrets in my life. I only hope this child is a boy because I do not want a daughter who would try to emulate me. I am a disgrace
―You do not want our child?. Searing pain pushed his lungs into his ribs.
―Of course, I do. It‘s why I won‘t pursue the divorce. I‘m not stupid Alessandro. There‘s not a judge in the universe who wouldn‘t take a child away from a woman who lives in a tiny twobedroom apartment to place him with his billionaire father. I don‘t have a leg to stand on or the funds to fight you. I‘ll cut my losses and go home. It‘s all I can do
He nodded at her words. ―You are right of course. You would not win against me in a
courtroom battle He didn‘t tell her he would never take their child from her.
will stay here with me until Dulce is fit enough to be discharged from the hospital and then we‘ll return home
―Fine She didn‘t argue. How could she? She studied the swirls of his paisley tie. ―Do you mind if I go lie down for a bit? I‘m suddenly feeling a little shell-shocked.
―I think it is a good idea He extended his hand to help her to her feet, but she ignored it and walked the long way around the sofa. ―You will call your grandparents in the morning and advise them. You can also call the viper of a lawyer you have and have her halt your divorce proceedings. Tell her to send me the bill
―Sure,ǁ she whispered as she moved in a trance-like state and left the room. She was pregnant. She was pregnant with Alessandro‘s baby. She stopped and looked at him suddenly. ―I hope how he was conceived is not a precursor to his disposition or he will be one incredibly angry and bad-
tempered child. There was not a lot of love when he was made She furrowed her brow as she walked away again, completely oblivious to the stricken expression on Alessandro‘s face at her words.
She climbed onto the bed and pulled a pillow to her chest and rolled to her side. She was having a baby. Ever since she had been ill, her mind had been focused on this moment. Now it was here it felt surreal. She heard Alessandro get off the sofa
and the soft sound of his footsteps as he crossed the living room and then the sliding glass of the patio doors filtered to her. She‘d half-expected him to follow her into the bedroom but he hadn‘t. He was outside likely celebrating his victory with a cigarette and a drink. He got what he wanted. She would go home and go back to being his wife while he kept his mistress with him instead of her. At least now, she wouldn‘t be so lonely. She‘d have a baby to keep her occupied, to keep her from feeling so alone.
His parents, Rosetta and Charles would be thrilled. Her grandparents would be as well. They only wanted her happiness. Alessandro‘s grandfather would potentially be glad of an heir but maybe not, he‘d never liked her if she were honest.
She wiped her tears off her cheeks and hiccupped. At some point she drifted off
She lifted on one elbow and watched him sleep. Would their child have blue-grey eyes or golden ones? Would his hair be black or brown? Would he have her pale skin or
Alessandro‘s mocha complexion? She traced her finger over his long straight nose and then his high cheekbones. It was not likely they would make a child as beautiful as his parents had done. Even his sister was a stunning woman. No, their child would not have a supermodel for a mother and so for his sake, she prayed he looked more like his father than his mother. It would be most difficult to be plain and homely when your father was Alessandro Giordano. She wondered if their
child would hate her because she was not as beautiful as his father‘s mistress. She looked up from her musings to see Alessandro watching her, his tiger eyes sharp and bright in the darkened room.
―What are you thinking Mackenna?. he asked quietly exquisitely aware she was examining him in detail.
―What if our child looks more like me than you?. She asked as pain stabbed her heart. ―He will hate me
Alessandro‘s eyebrows shot up in disbelief. ―At two in the morning this is what you think of?. He rolled onto his side and stared at her. ―Silly girl He tilted her chin and kissed her lips softly. ―I want nothing more than for our baby to look just like you with big blue-grey eyes and a tiny button nose
―What if. his fingers on her lips stopped her from speaking and she frowned.
His hand was gentle as it curved her cheek, his thumb brushing against her jaw as he moved in to kiss her again. Her lips parted and he deepened the kiss, twirling his tongue around hers as he tucked her under his torso and dropping his leg over her hip. He felt her responding to him and he demanded more from her, sucking gently on her lower lip.
Mackenna wasn‘t sure how long Alessandro kissed her but when his lips left hers, she felt empty until his lips trailed down her chin, to the long column of her throat and to the exposed skin where he unbuttoned the pyjama top. He kissed the “Yes,ǁ she whispered just as he took her n****e into his mouth.
―Then I should get my fair share now He chuckled as she moaned loudly as he drew her deeper into the hot recess of his mouth. His hands squeezed and massaged her as his tongue lathered her in sweltering kisses. He moved downward, trailing kisses through the deep valley of her breasts and pausing at her navel, swirling his tongue inside and her back arched. She hugged his head to her belly as he peppered it with tiny kisses, his long fingers splayed possessively over the flat expanseConTEent bel0ngs to Nôv(e)lD/rama(.)Org .
of it. Then his hands moved lower still, sliding under the silk bottoms and deep into her moist middle.
―Alessandro,ǁ she moaned his name as he dipped his fingers in and out of her body and he edged back up the bed, his fingers stroking her deeply and firmly while his lips claimed hers again.
Her hands caressed him, and she noticed now he‘d come to bed naked, just as he‘d always done. She ran her fingers over his lean physique, down the hollow of his spine to his back and around the hard curve of his buttocks before rounding to the front and grasping the hard shaft resting between them. His groan as she slid her fingers up and down him made her feel sexy and powerful and she kept a slow steady rhythm, rubbing him against the silk of her pajamas. He tore his lips from hers.
“Cara mia,” he whispered violently as his eyes bore into hers, ―continue and I will have no self- control left
―It is only fair since I have none left either She wriggled out of her bottoms and kicked them to the floor and parted her legs as he moved between them. He filled her in one fluid movement, slick and hot and she moaned against his lips which had met hers in the same moment they were joined.
Unlike their last union which had been rushed and furious, Alessandro loved her with long, steady strokes bringing her to a shattering climax as he drank in her cries. He whispered words of adoration in her ears, his hands never stopping their caresses. It was only when he brought her to a second orgasm, he allowed himself to do as she begged, and he let go filling her to capacity as he held himself tight and deep to the very hilt of his manhood inside of her.
She was certain she imagined his tears mingling with hers as he rubbed his cheek against hers, her legs wound tightly around his thighs, unwilling to let him go. He seemed in no hurry to leave her though and he kept his face next to hers, cheek to cheek on the pillow, his breath heavy and hurried as he tried to catch it.
She felt her eyes growing heavy as exhaustion overwhelmed her. She only protested lightly when he moved from her, dragging her to his side, keeping her pinned tight to him. Sleep was not long in coming.
Neither was the agony of loneliness when she woke in the quiet of the morning to find once again, he had left her alone.