Chapter 16
Chapter 16
Mackenna was in her office working furiously and trying to get over the anger she had felt this morning. It wasn‘t right. She had fallen asleep in Alessandro‘s arms on the sofa, and she had felt safe, content, and happy. She‘d had dreams of making love with him and of sleeping with him, in his warm embrace exhausted from lovemaking.
— Her heart was acting as if it was the most natural thing in the world to be back in his arms, but her head was telling her she was a bigger i***t today than she‘d been five years ago. Her anger was self-directed, because when she‘d woken alone in her tiny twin bed, tucked into it, she‘d instantly reached for him, and he wasn‘t there. Finding herself along, she‘d begun sobbing like a fool. She was crying at the drop of a hat over Alessandro Giordano. It was silly and asinine, and she was ashamed of herself. Her emotions were out of control.
Her stomach was in knots, she felt queasy and never had she been so exhausted. This last month was proving to be the most difficult of her life and she felt like there was no end in sight, no light at the end of her tunnel. She knew the time between now and until her divorce finalized would be a battle with Alessandro. Worse, she feared the time after her divorce was likely going to be the most excruciating of her life. How had she thought she would be able to just move on after him when it was clear she had never gotten over him? Distance would help, she knew it but moving to Antarctica was not an option; no matter how much the solitude beckoned her.
.
She pushed her paperwork across her desk and reached for her coffee cup to find it empty and she scowled. She needed a caffeine fix. She stood up and moved to the door of her office and as she tore it open, she came face-to-face with the man of last night‘s lustful fantasies, poised to knock on the door. She shoved past him. ―I‘m workingProperty belongs to Nôvel(D)r/ama.Org.
―I know He felt his defenses rise instantly at her cold expression. ―I came to ask if you‘re feeling any better after a night of rest. I thought we could do dinner tonight He followed her as she marched down the hall away from her office, clutching a metal thermal cup in her hand.
There is no reason for us to see each other again She stopped and faced him.― You might want to check in with your lawyer by the way because mine is petitioning the court today to try to push the court date ahead to the end of this month instead of next
He was stunned by her words and her change in disposition. She had switched from the clinging vine she‘d been last night when he‘d carried her and tucked her into her tiny single bed to a catty, cold woman before him. His feet stopped moving as he stared at her back as she swung on her heel and continued walking away from him.
―Mackenna He whispered her name as his throat clogged off and he cleared it and spoke her name again, louder, and firmly. ―Mackenna. We are going to talk about this
―There‘s nothing to talk about Alessandro. I thought about it, and I‘ve figured out what you‘re doing. You think you can feed me pizza and watch fuzzy dog movies
and I‘ll forget all the terrible things you put me through. Well, you‘re wrong She faced him then and poked him in the chest.
―I still remember. I still remember wherever we went, your mistress came too. I remember you left me home alone all the time and you took her with you. I remember when you laughed at me and said you would sleep with her every day, and I would still take you in my bed every night She saw her words affect him as if she‘d struck him a physical blow. She continued her verbal assault,
―well you were wrong Alessandro. I wouldn‘t do it then and I won‘t now. If it weren„t for the fact Dulce is in a bed upstairs in the orthopedic wing, you and I wouldn‘t be having this discussion. This, again, reminds me you would follow her to the ends of the Earth if she demanded it! Tell me
Alessandro, has there ever been a phone call from her you didn‘t answer?. When he opened his mouth, she cut him off,
―don‘t bother. I already know the answer. You‘re as obsessed with her as you are with me. The only difference, she likes it. I just want my freedom, so back off and leave me alone She started to walk away but he grabbed her arm and spun her back and he glared
―Mackenna, I have done my best to try to be patient with you, but it seems instead of maturing you regress to a child. It‘s like trying to reason with a rabid dog. You have preconceived notions of injustice in your head, and you cannot accept maybe you were the one who made mistakes. You refuse to acknowledge any of the responsibility for this situation. You never wanted to talk in the past.
You never asked me if I was sleeping with Dulce. You accused me. You always accused and you already had your mind made up as to the answer, so why would I bother to deny something you had already decided as fact? You would trust the word of another woman over your husband! You took her word and believed it for the God‘s-honest truth. You didn‘t ask me Mackenna. You told me to choose between my wife and my lover and there was no choice to make because to me, they were one and the same. You were the one who walked out on me. You left me!ǁ
She saw his eyes were cold and furious and she wanted to say something, but he wasn‘t done.
―Do you think I enjoy this? There have been plenty of mornings where I‘ve woken alone in our bed and decided it was the day I was going to file for the divorce He saw her shocked expression and his lips tightened.
―You actually believe having an immature shrew for a wife who accused, whined and complained about everything! did before she decided to run away from home like a spoiled brat was a treat? I told myself you were young and losing your parents so young was why you were so damn insecure but I loved you and so I tried to be patient. If there is anything my family has taught me is marriage
is something you work on and damn it, I don‘t mind working hard at anything He threw his hand in the air exasperated with her,
―and there were days I would gladly have thrown in the towel, but I kept at it. Do you know what? Let‘s just get on with it because I‘m tired of it Mackenna. I‘m tired of this constant game of cat and mouse you like to play. You want a divorce? Fine. The minute l‘m back in Milan, I‘ll sign the papers. You can marry your bloody orthopedic surgeon and have your little blue-eyed, blonde haired babies.I‘m done He threw his hands in the air and pushed past her, striding straight down the hall and out into the bright sunshine. her heart thundering with such ferocity she couldn‘t breathe. She clutched her chest tightly as pain seared her just as one of the doctors who had treated her two years past when she‘d contracted bacterial meningitis took her by the hands.
―Mac, are you okay
―Hurts,ǁ she gasped as her heart felt like it was exploding inside of her chest. Alessandro had never walked away from her before and the searing pain of it was excruciating. ―Hurts so much
―Mac, I‘m going to take you to the trauma unit just to look you over, okay?”
She was aware Doctor Ingram was escorting her through a side door through a long corridor and she saw Savannah looking in her direction as the doctor helped her into a chair and grabbed a cuff from a wall and took her blood pressure. She was
aware of her surroundings, yet, everything seemed so hazy and cloudy, and she fought to keep her eyes opened.
―Hey Mac, you, okay?. Savannah knelt in front of her.
―Getting divorced,ǁ she managed to get the words out as the doctor took her readings. ―I told Alessandro I called Camille and he said he‘d sign the papers She saw the surprise on Savannah‘s
face. ―He‘s very angry
―He‘d have to be to say he‘d sign the papers. Mac, what happened? Last night you were all cuddled on the sofa with him and today you‘re calling Camille Savannah looked to Doctor Ingram as the man said her blood pressure was high but not dangerously so. ―Mac, Brody needs to listen to your chest, okay?. She reached up and unbuttoned the first three buttons of her shirt and squeezed her hands. ―Mac, what‘s going on?.
―I can‘t do it, Savannah. I can‘t do it She felt her breath growing short and Doctor Ingram reached for oxygen and in seconds she had a mask on her face, and she was laying on her back on a cot and staring at the ceiling tiles as they checked her out thoroughly. She heard words like 'panic attack‘ and 'stress‘ and 'weakened heart muscles‘ and for each tear Savannah wiped away from her face, ten more fell. She sobbed as she looked at her best friend. ―Why does it hurt so much? It‘s what
―No, honey. It isn‘t what you wanted Savannah corrected her the way only a best friend could. ―Maybe a month ago it was but not now, not that you‘ve found each other again. You got scared this morning and you called Camille and now it‘s backfired,ǁ
Her head felt fuzzy and light and then as she opened her mouth to say something she heard the doctor beside her call her name and then she was lost to a black void which felt good in comparison to the pain she was feeling.
She was dreaming she realized as she smiled to herself. She was with Alessandro in Milan, in their big bedroom in the Giordano family estate and they were snuggled in the middle of the big bed, and he was cuddling her and telling her how much he‘d missed her when he‘d been gone. He never slept in their bed when he wasn‘t with her. It felt too strange to lie in a
bed knowing she was in another bed so far away from him.
―You should come with me, Mackenna
The way he‘d said her name always made her smile, the accent heavy on the end of her name and 'ken‘in her name more of a 'kane‘ and she mocked him until he tickled her ribs and she had to beg him to stop. ―Well, Alessandro, l‘d go with you if | didn‘t have midterms on Monday. It won‘t be long, and I‘ll be done school and you will have my undivided attention
―Until you have your job placement He stroked her brow with his thumbs, smoothing out the furrows studying had put there.
―It‘s only six weeks and then I‘ll have my diploma and then we can be together more. I can‘t wait to be with you when you travel
―You should come with me to Rio He threw his long leg over her hip and pulled her close. ―We‘re interviewing for some new models to represent our line. You can help me survive the monotony. It will be in August
―I‘d like that She ran her hand over his rippled abdomen. ―While you‘re looking at gorgeous supermodels all day, what am I supposed to do?. .
―You‘re supposed to look at me, of course He laughed at her pout. ―Rio has
―I think I‘d rather just sit and watch you,ǁ she said quietly as she lifted her eyes to his. Spending his money shopping felt weird to her and lying on a beach alone held no appeal to her. ―Can I come with you and just be with you?.
―Yes. I‘ll keep you at my side all the time He grinned as he rolled her onto her back. ―For now, though, I‘d like you under instead of beside me if it‘s okay with you. I„ve missed my little wife
She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him to her. ―I‘ve missed you too. Alessandro His name was a sigh as he began making love to her.