Chapter - 50
Chapter - 50
Sophia's POV This content belongs to Nô/velDra/ma.Org .
When Nick left the room I couldn't comprehend why. I saw him settling in the car and driving off. I was always scared of having this talk with him, scared of being left alone. When Ethan had brought the topic up in the car, I could feel Nick's stare on me. I knew he had noticed me tense up.
When he spoke about the baby , my immediate reaction had given away my uneasiness with the topic. I had to tell him about it . So I took a deep breath and decided to speak.
I told him that I couldn't give Ethan what he wanted. There was a brief moment of silence between us before Nick asked if I can conceive or not. His tone seemed so distant and cold but there was a trace of vulnerability in it. I told him that I could but before I could elaborate, he walked away.
At that moment I could feel my heart breaking. Did he discard me because I won't be able to carry a child. No , what am I even thinking? I know he would come back once he cools down. But I didn't know that he was so keen for a ch- Wait. .........Shit! He got it wrong.
He asked me if I can conceive or not and I said I can. Now he thinks that I don't want to.
Oh God! That pig-headed, stupid , impatient man!
Nick's POV
By the time I had reached home , it was pretty clear in my head that she would have never said something like that. It was fucking stupid of me to act on impulse.
I parked the car and rushed in. The house seemed calm. I ran up the stairs into our room, but swinging open , I found it empty. The sense of Deja vu hit me hard.
What had I done! Maybe she wanted to tell that she needs some time or something and I didn't even listen to what she had to say.
I hope I didn't fuck it up so bad for her to leave the house. I searched each and every room before I came across one of our maids.
" Did you see Sophia?" My voice came out just as impatient.
" I saw Mrs. Carter going to the backyard a few minutes back." I didn't wait a second before sprinting off in that direction. My eyes landed on her back facing me when I breathed out in relief.
I slowly walked up to her and I knew that she could feel my presence. I carefully sat down beside her .
" Sophia ." She kept staring in front of her.
" I am sorry. " I mumbled to which she sighed .
" I was fifteen at that time when one day in school I felt this immense pain in my lower abdomen. My parents were called and I was taken to the hospital. They ran some tests on me finally it was learnt that I had some gynecological issues." I clenched my eyes shut , realising how wrong I was.
"The doctor said that if I ever conceive , the pregnancy won't be a smooth one and my life will be at a much greater risk than the baby's." Sophia still wasn't looking at me. She was staring off into distance and her face held a painful smile. The guilt coursed through me for assuming things beforehand.
" Sophia-" She cut me off.
" You know , with time I learnt to grow with it but still I feel that void in me. Like every other woman I too wanted to hold my baby for the first time, teach him to walk , hear him or her speak for the first time but..." She trailed off. Her eyes were glossy by now.
I shifted closer to her and took her hand in mine in an attempt to comfort her where I was the one to contribute to her pain. I was grateful that she didn't snatch her hand away.
" It took me a lot of courage to speak to you on this but you didn't even let me complete. You just left assuming that I didn't want to carry your child." I looked at her shocked.
"How ?" She hang her head down with a sad smile , tear drops escaping her eyes.
" I can understand what you think but what bothers is that you could think that. Do you not know me? " This was the first time that she looked up at me , hurt evident in her eyes.
I opened my mouth a few times but nothing came out. I was guilty, so guilty that I had nothing to say.
" It's a sore topic for me and you just added on to the bitterness and pain. When you left , at first , I felt so helpless. I felt like you will discard me from your life because I can't give you a child." I vigorously shook my head in disagreement. "Believe me when I say that I had never felt so weak in my life." She was silently crying. I felt my heart break into million pieces at the sight. She looked so vulnerable and knowing that I was the reason behind it, was intensifying the ache .
" Sophia , I- it was - I know it was so so stupid of me to walk away like that , but- I felt like I was going to hear those same things , those same words which I had heard from Clara. I was scared of being rejected again.
But I could have never thought of leaving you , even if what I thought was true. You are too important in my life to be thrown away. Heck I , for sure know that I would crawl back to you even if you throw away my everything in flames. " She kept on staring at me. I was growing nervous with every second. I wanted her to atleast say something.
" Sophia , say something, scold me, shout at me, hit me if you want but just say something please . I am sorry , just- please." The desperation was so clear in my words.
She came up and positioned herself on my lap . I was confused of what she wanted to do. Nevertheless, I put my hands around her waist , securing her on my lap.
I was ready for any kind of punishment she wanted to give but what she did confounded me. She held my face with both her hands and pecked my nose. I looked at her surprised while she faintly smiled at me.
" What are you... I don't deserve this." I blurted out. She sighed and nodded.
" Yes you don't. You're an idiot, a pea-brained pig. " She paused for a second before continuing. "But then you're hurt. You're hurt from your past experiences and I want you to let go of them, to move on. I am your present and I am not Clara. By letting your past in , you're hurting not only me but yourself too. Just know that I love you way to much to ever intentionally hurt you. " Saying this she kissed my forehead and wrapping her arms around me, put her head in the crook of my neck.
" I don't even know how the fuck did I end up with you as my wife but I couldn't have been happier. I love you so fucking much.You are one of the two most beautiful things that ever happened in my life. I am so sorry for hurting you, I am so damn sorry." I pulled her closer to me.
We stayed like that in each other's embrace for some minutes and for a few more