She Approved the Split He Fell Apart Novel

095 When Did I lose you?

Sebastian’s POV

“Scar, “I take her arm gently and she instantly swings me off, “1–”

She glares at me, waiting impatiently.

Seeing her cold eyes hurts. Pain grabs my chest, but I’m hopeless and powerless in front of such pain. There is nothing I can do. I can barely recognize the girl who once had the brightest smile toward me.

She knows I left Ava in the hospital to come here, and before when I did that for her, her whole face would light up, and her beautiful eyes would curve into crescents as she hung herself on my arms, smiling sneakily like a little fox.

But now she doesn’t even look at me.

1…” I open my mouth, but all the words that I wanted to tell her, suddenly disappear, “…” I can’t find anything to say.

Scar rolls her eyes, and turns to leave.

“I’ll give you what you want!” I blurt, knowing it’s the only thing I can say to stop her from leaving, “I will sign the divorce papers…if that’s what you REALLY want.”

Scar stops, turns around, looks at me before her eyes dart to my empty hands, and then she looks back at me. She didn’t say a word, and somehow she managed to write “impatience” in her every move.

“I just…” I force my tongue to roll when hope drains from me, Would all this still happen, if I didn’t take that brief kiss from Ava? I just, can’t come around to accept that my perfect life was turned upside down because of a kiss, or because I was busier for just a couple of days…maybe months….

“I just want to ask you a question-” I say, only to freeze when a strong déjà vu gets hold of me.

This exact same thing happened, not so long ago! Except that time, Scar was in my position, begging with caution when she had the divorce papers gripped in her hand.

What did I do? I thought it was just another game of hers, and ripped the folder from her, leaving a paper cut on her hand, because I was in a hurry to go to comfort Ava

Is that what she is here for? To meet with Adrian?

I suddenly realize Scar wasn’t stalling when she fumbled with her words back then. It was because of the throat–cutting pain when you see someone you care about look at you with a cold, emotionless look that tells you that they don’t care about you.

Like the one she is giving me right now.

What did I say back then? I said I didn’t have time for her games. The light in her eyes went out after I said that, and only now did I realize, I never even got to know what she wanted to ask, because now I don’t know how to ask her the question I wanted to ask.

Her look says it all–no matter what my question is, it won’t matter.

I was taught to be considerate, to put myself in other’s shoes, I never knew that I could inflict such harm,

095 When Did lose you?

on no other than the wife that I thought I was doing right by.

I wasn’t, not by a long distance.

“Wh–when did I lose you?” I ask her, my words cutting open my throat, but I just want to know, even though I know my questions have no good answers, “I lost you, didn’t I?”

Scar sighs, her watery purple eyes filled with resignment. She doesn’t want to answer, but she is already doing much better than how I reacted to her in the same situation.

My parents were the perfect couple before the car accident that took them from me. I always thought my marriage would be the same one day. Maybe that was what planted the grudge against Scar in me that I just couldn’t get over with no matter what. I felt like she took the perfect marriage away from me, the one that I knew I could have.

The truth is, she did everything my mom did for my father and more, when I barely kept my end of the responsibility.

In fact, I broke the vow I held sacred when I failed to push Ava away.

blunt

It was just one kiss, I thought. I’m glad that Scar saw the real weight of that kiss, and gave me this knock on the head, because I was losing myself, in her compromising and in the illusion of just “a close friend“.

I wasn’t doing right by her even before that kiss.

I don’t deserve her. Published by Nôv'elD/rama.Org.

“I have signed the papers,” I lied, I didn’t, but I will, “I’ll get them to you if, IF that’s what you want-”

She nods.

I stand there, as if waiting to see if she would change her mind. But she waits for a “ment, and seeing I have no other things to say, she nods lightly out of courtesy, and leaves without anouer look at me.