Secret Doors

A flashback.

Portia’s P. O. V:Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

I run to my bedroom letting all the tears I held back for hours. I saw Sherlock with Irene very happy and looking like a good husband and wife while I am his freaking fiancee. All the things I did for us to make this relationship work falls down. How could you lie so hard to me? Every lie you made is like I’m going to hell. Burning in flames of pain. How could you be casually cruel in telling me I Love You?

I cried myself to sleep and woke up with the sun hitting my face and burning through my soul. It’s like the sun is waking me up from the dream that he made up. The scene of last night makes me realize how I drowned in this beautiful nightmare for a long time and it’s time to say goodbye from this chain Sherlock. It was already three in the afternoon the first time I woke up so late.

I undressed and look in the mirror. I’m not as glowing as before my face looks pale and my skin is tainted with bruises and scars of yesterday. I’ve been physically, mentally, and emotionally drained from him. All these bruises which I believe came from my own fault will be my trophy of winning over you Sherlock.

I washed my skinny body and started putting some bath salts that Airi gave me. For the very first time after mom died, I tried to relax in a bathtub. Our happy memories started flashing in my imagination and tears bested up in my eyes like it’s only yesterday when you love to tell me how you love me, Those dreams we built under the night sky feel like it’s been just awhile since we made it.

After bathing I text Sherlock to get ready because we are going on a date but he refuses. I know why sweetheart please stop telling me it’s about your work. I know you are seeing her again because you can’t get enough of her. “Will you do it for me, please? Just this time prioritize me and you won’t need to do it all over again.” I said over a phone call to him that made me almost cry.

I heard his handsome laugh that I love the most. “Okay, okay but I’ll be late a little. Like eight o’clock. Is it okay?” He asked for my permission acting the perfect boyfriend at all times. “Sure, I’ll wait for you always.” I agreed because this is the last time I will wait for you. I fixed myself in the mirror and make sure I’ll be the most stunning person tonight, even not from his eyes.

I wore that sexy red dress he loves and put on some red lipstick because that is what he loves. I concealed all the bruises I had and curled them and put them on a messy vintage bun. I wear my red stiletto and went to our dating spot. The spot where we first had a luxurious date. Our dream date since college.

I sit at the reserved table to wait for him. It’s already quarter to eight and I’m hoping he will somehow consider not being so late that I look so miserable here. Before the clock tick it’s time to eight, he arrives looking fresh. It’s not the same polo he wears earlier when he send me a photo that he was going to a meeting.

“Hey, babe.” He greeted me and kissed me on the cheeks. We had fun eating and talking about our past. Yes, I intended to make him remember our past so he will somehow remember us for the last time. He’s still the most handsome guy I met. The one who makes me blush but this will be the last time he will hurt me.

After we had dinner we went to an amusement park like on our first date. I take him to every place we once loved. “What’s with the throwback babe.” He said while we are dancing to our theme song. We are now at the top of a tower where we love to watch the stars in the middle of the night. “I just want to remember this day with you,” I said and hug him for the last time.

We ride a cable car to move to the observatory tower. At the cable car, you will see a wonderful view. A romantic place where he proposed to me. I remember how people cheers for us when we reach the tower. But this time there will be no audience it will be only the both of us who will know about this. As the cable car started to move I started to speak.

“Sherlock I wanted you to take care of yourself always.” He looks at me confused and was about to talk but I stopped him. “Take care of grandma for me and don’t hate your brother so much because he loves you.” My eyes are getting watery. “Don’t forget to bring roses for your mom’s grave every month it makes your dad happy.” My voice is cracking up and he’s looking at me. “What are you talking about babe? We are going to do all of that together.” He said confusedly.

“Just listen up. Please keep growing and reach your dreams because I won’t be always at your side to reach those. And please eat breakfast because from now on I won’t be able to call you and wake you up for breakfast.” Now I am crying like a kid and it’s making me breathe hard. “Play violin because that’s what you always wanted. And you are the best when you are playing music.” I continued.

“Last thing stop saying sorry to people. It’s not your fault. And everybody do mistakes.” I said for the last time and before he could even process everything and before we finally reach our stop I kissed him hard for the last time. It took about a minute and as soon as the cable car doors open I said my last words.

“I have already forgiven both of you. Please be happy as always my Sherlock.” After those words, I let my guard down and cried myself. While walking out. He tries to reach me but I manage to run with my stiletto and ride a cab. I told the driver to drive me to the nearest station.

After I rode the train I called my friend to get my car and all my things to my house and hand it to Jean. I arrived at the station where Airi lives, she’s a friend of mine that lives far from my city. The rain cried with me and it made me soaking wet but I don’t mind. I walked and walked till I reach her house. I knocked at her door and she was shocked to see me.

“Hey, Portia! Why are you so wet?” She panics and lets me in. With that last thing, my eyes went blurry and everything went black.