Chapter 12
Nathan
1 strode through the clinic doors exactly thirty minutes before Terra’s shaded, earning curious looks from staff and patients alike at my punctual arrival. But after a week apart, I refused to miss a single possible moment in her presence, however brief
Derek trailed after me, amusement crinkling his eyes as I made directly for the small waiting area by reception I had staked cut as my own over the past days.
“Eager today, are we?” he remarked wryly, lowering his bulky frame into the chair beside me. “Most men only pine so for their acmal mate.”
I narrowed my eyes in warning, not appreciating the implication “I merely wish to show Terra I intend to keep my word the time. Being here when she’s available proves my reliability
Derek held up his hands peaceably, though his grin remained unapologetically knowing. “As you say, Alpha. I’m sure she’ll be positively thrilled at your dedication to loitering outside her workplace every day.”
I bit back a sharp retort, not wishing to attract unwanted attention from nearby patients. But his joking barb hit painfully close to my own gnawing doubts
Would Terra interpret my persistent presence as a comforting sign of my commitment to rebuilding trust? Or as the possessive hovering of an obsessed suitor unable to relinquish his claim on her?
In truth, my own motivations likely blurred somewhere between the two extremes. The mate bond between us throbbed as painfully alive as the day Terra first disappeared, though she refused yet to acknowledge it.
And seeing her with another man, however innocent, twisted me with a primal jealousy no logic could defeat. But until she, welcomed me at her side again freely, I had no right to interfere in her choices.
Brooding uneasily over where the line lay between protective mate and domineering scoundrel, I paused, mid-pace at the sound of Terra’s voice rising lightly down the hall. My inner wolf perked up instinctively at our mate’s nearness as Terra came into view, clutching a thick folder and speaking intently with a blonde nurse about proper post-op care for one of her patients.
The fierce intellect and compassion that made her an exceptional healer shone through with each precise instruction and word of encouragement for her staff. Though I remained the interloper peering wistfully through glass here, witnessing Terra in her element stirred profound pride. The pack would surely come to love her as a Luna as deeply as I always had,
When she glanced up and noticed me waiting. Terra’s determined stride faltered briefly. I offered a small smile, hoping to appear nonthreatening despite my imposing presence in this world that was rightfully hers. After a moment’s hesitation, she nodded politely in return before turning her focus back to her colleague.
“You’ve got this covered, Rose. Call me anytime if you need guidance. Otherwise I’ll see you tomorrow.” With an encouraging pat on the nurse’s shoulder, she dismissed her and approached me, curiosity mingled with wariness in her intelligent gaze.
“Nathan. I wasn’t expecting you again so soon.” Her tone held a note of accusation.
I scrambled to explain. “Apologies for the intrusion. I only wished to confirm the travel arrangements I’ve made in preparation for your arrival tomorrow. If any details are unsatisfactory, just say the word.”
Terra’s expression remained aloof and distrustfull. “My assistant has already reviewed everything thoroughly. Your presence here is unnecessary.”
The blunt dismissal stung, but I forced an understanding smile. Of course, forgive my pestering. I’ll leave you be.”
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By the time Derek returned 1 had reigned in my inner beast, sipping hack into my shift once more. But he took one look. on of sales on the rained carpet and understood regardess. His heavy hand rested on my shoulder briefly in ty. We are dinner in silence, the rare steak sitting like ash in my mouth. I had to release this torment
somehow before it unerly consumed me
ble meal. Derek announced truly he would be out for the remainder of the evening I envied his freedom to escape these suocating rooms that had become my self-inflated prison. The city’s dazzling nightlife held nothing but bitter reminders of the happiness cruelly denied me. But remaining alone with my corrosive thoughts would pactly drive ree trad
TI join you” I declared abruptly, grabbing my discarded jacket Derek’s brows lifted in surprise but he merely nodded and led the way downstairs. I welcomed the bracing chill of the night air after feeling trapped all day. Together we strode directly soward the grish neon beckoning through the dark like a tawdry mirage. I craved the refuge of noise and Sew reckless boun
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The pulsing lights and pounding music enveloped me as we entered some crowded club recommended by our hotel’s clerk Here power and prestige meant nothing. The press of heated bodies and cloying perfumes drowned out conscious thought. Grebel burned away reason until only primal instinct remained
The night passed in a blur of faceless drinks and dancing partners. But their voluptuous curves and coquettish laughs brought me ou pleasure. No amount of meaningless sensual indulgence could fill the ragged void in my soul, or erase the memories of one delicate fame-haired mate seared into my being.
Near dawn we finally stumbled back upstairs, the walk sobering me slightly. Safely in my suite, away from indiscreet eyes, I sagged back against the door, leak despair crashing down on me anew. All the distractions and denial could not alter the harsh truth – my very spirit felt sundered without Terra. Her rejection had shattered me utterly.
Derek’s gruff voice cut through the haze of drink and gloom still logging my mind. “Drowning sorrows never washed any away, Alpha. Believe me, I know,”
I turned hollow, bloodshot eyes up to meet his. The ghosts haunting his clark gaz me he spoke from experience. We had never discussed the tragedy that took his family years ago, but in this moment sur shared understanding of love’s agony connected us.
“I don’t know what else to do,” I admitted h**ly. “The pain is crushing me, yet I’m powerless to regain what was lost.”
Derek clapped my slumped shoulder bracingly. “Any battle can be won with patience and resilience. Yours will come again in time”.
1 shook my head despondently. All fortitude had deserted me. She despises the sight of me now. I ruined the most precious gift fate ever bestowed.”
“She is still here, is she not? That alone proves the spark between you yet lives. Keep faith, and tend it gently
Wise counsel, though in my despair it barely penetrated. 1 needed rest from this ceaseless torment. But even in my dreams, Terra’s reproachful emerald eyes followed me unrelentingly. A fitting punishment I richly deserved.
Over the next days, I maintained a polite facade in Terra’s presence, never betraying the raging tumult within. She remained aloof, speaking to me only as necessary about my father’s treatment plans. The affectionate case we had begun rebuilding between us retreated again behind walls of courtesy. My rash jealousy had only driven her farther away.
During her scarce free hours, Terra often disappeared to dine with the brown-haired doctor I now knew to be her lover. Just glimpsing them together, his hand alighting casually on her lower back as they laughed over some private joke, made my claws threaten to burst free. But I kept my volatile emotions ruthlessly leashed. She would not see me falter.
Tonight they sat tucked discreetly in a corner booth at an elegant restaurant where Derek and I stopped for a morose drink after another useless day.
I tried ignoring their presence, but my traitorous gaze kept drifting back to admire how Terra’s fiery curls caught the low light. Her companion leaned close to whisper something that brought an alluring flush to her fair cheeks.
With a guttural curse, I tossed back the remains of my whiskey. Derek eyed me warily as my hand snapped the heavy glass down. “Steady on. She’ll only retreat further if you make a scene.
“So I should just accept this constant torment?” I growled. Every instinct roared to confront the interloper threatening my mate claim.
Derek shook his head. “Accept it or not, lashing out will only worsen the hurt. Patience and understanding are your only
I raked a hand roughly through my hair, grappling for fractured composure. Derek spoke wisdom, but rational thought stood no chance against the raging creature snarling and clawing inside me.
“I need air,” I bit out abruptly, throwing down a w**d of bills. Before Derek could respond. I stormed outside into the bracing autumn night. Even the icy wind could not cool my fevered skin or clear the red haze clouding my mind. Nothing but the sweet coppery **g of blood would satisfy this savagery.
I scarcely registered shifing my fine clothes shredding away as snarling jaws and razor claws took form. Then I was racing down abandoned alleys, giving my fury free rein. In the quiet industrial district, none would mark my passage as anything more than a stray dog’s shadow.
By the time my pulse finally slowed from its frantic hammering my massive paws stood planted amidst shredded and mangled debris. Crumpled metal sheeting bore jagged claw marks, Dumpsters were overturned savagely, their contents strewn across cracked asphalt, I had no memory of the destruction, lost in the scarlet fog of rage. But seeing the evidence sent ice through my veins, calming the last simmering embers,
Another feral outburst like this in a public place would reveal my true nature irrevocably. Terra already considered me little more than a monster from her past, unworthy of trust or tenderness. Such unhinged violence would only prove her harsh judgment justified.
Shame cooling my blood further, I turned and loped back through the silent streets, .., Jury’s aftermath lending clarity. As desperate as this separation felt, becoming the very beast Terra feared would only drive us farther apart. I had to master myself and remain patient.
Nothing worthwhile ever came easily, after all. The moon had granted Terra and I a second chance, however narrow the path back to her graces. I could not fail now.
No matter the anguish, I would endure until she turned her kind heart toward me once more.