Chapter 25
Jennie Wilson POV
I heard a sound, my mind said not to look back and keep walking from here, but my traitous body jerked and looked at the direction of the sound.
I heard a sound, my mind said not to look back and keep walking from here, but my traitous body jerked and looked at the direction of the sound.
Vincent was lying on the floor and he was crying. He was huffing for air his trembling turning into shuddering, all his muscles strained.
I looked at him with shocked eyes, he was wheezing.
Oh shit Vincent!!!!!!!!
No!! Leave Jennie…… don’t mess things up.
He doesn’t deserve your help…… leave him.
I don’t care if he lives or die. Just run from here if you want to save your life.
My mind was rambling something, but my heart was saying something different.
There was goodness in me, it didn’t matter if it is was for my greatest enemy. I had that humanity to help a dying person no matter who they were.
Ahhhh!!!! God!!!!
I reached him and pulled him up.
” Hey! Calm down. You will hyperventilate if you keep going like this.”
He whimpered, and I outstretched my arm towards his impulse. I put his arms on my shoulder and he flinched.
” It’s alright…” I whispered and made him stand and we started walking towards the bed.
” Take deep breaths Vincent, you are going to be fine. Relax, breathe.”
I placed him on the bed, he scrambled his feet and he was still panting, his shudders ceaseless and I stroked his back in a reassuring way, reveling in the feel of him.
” Everything’s alright. It’s ok Vincent” I said gently.
A few minutes passed by, but I didn’t stop stroking his back, until his breathing returned to normal and his shudders diminished. Then soon I realised I shouldn’t be touching him like that.
I whipped my hand back, and I was shocked he didn’t react. I was again being stupid and I know his next attack was about to come.
I decided to leave this place as soon as possible, but Vincent caught my wrist and pulled me towards him.
His eyes glared with fear bore into me, rattling me from inside out.
” Please don’t go! Please I beg you! ” His shaking and crying intensified.
He was a mystery I would never get to unfold. He was my abuser who didn’t deserve my single thought but his condition messed me up. What did that make me?
A stupid girl with a way too big heart.
I could hear his silent sobs, but he didn’t let me go.
” It’s ok Vincent. Everything’s going to be alright, I am here.” I stroked his back.
” When will that happen? I’m sick and tired of this! When will all this pain stop!” Vincent voice cracked and he started crying.
My eyes sought his face, a vortex of sorrow giving me a punch on my guts as I reflected on his words. I couldn’t have ever imagined that they had such a powerful impact on him, reinforcing his insecurities and self loathing.
” It has to stop sometime. It can’t last forever. You need to be strong Vincent.”
” Why? Why can’t anyone love me? Am I that bad?”
” No Vincent! Everyone’s loves you. You have most beautiful friends who care for you, your parents. You are not alone. World doesn’t end here… you have move ahead Vincent!”
“No…… Everybody treats me like a child and feed me with the pointless lies. For many years I have heard people saying I am alright, when they f***ing don’t know anything. I am not alright. I am f***ing trapped here and there’s no way out.”
” No Vincent! It’s not like what you think.” I held his hand and caressed it.
” Nobody understands me…… what I have gone through…… those f***ing nightmare and horrible illusions. It lasted for so long…… For too long. Eva is gone and along with her, my hope for salvation is gone too.”
” Do you even know how it feels like when no one’s beside you. Just hate. There are extra things that drag you down. Panic attacks, mood swings and uncontrollable anger…… so much anger, it’s destroy everything in me.”
His words pierced through me and fed me with anguish. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what he was going through on a daily basis.
” Eva was my beautiful moment and the worst. I can’t escape from it how much ever I try. Why is she doing this? Why can’t she be with me like she was before? Why Eva why?”
He swallowed hard, fisting his hand hard. A visible rigidness to his shoulders was always present. He held his body rigidly, still ensnared by his thoughts and it was heart-breaking.
” Vincent it’s ok! Please don’t panic. Breathe, breathe slowly Vincent” I rubbed his back.
His eyes glued into mine as he gasped for air. I made him lay on his bed. Tears rolled over his cheeks and he closed his eyes, breathing hard. I sat beside him and caressed his hair.
He laid his head on my lap wrapped his hands on my waist. I was heartbroken seeing him so vulnerable.
Everyone should have the freedom to be themselves, but it was so hard to achieve it. We lived only once, but we spend it on pleasing others and forgetting our own happiness- forgetting we were the ones we had to live with our choices, not them.
I glanced at Vincent, he was sleeping clutching my waist tightly. He was like a small kid, helpless and innocent.
Eva didn’t deserve his true love. I had seen many boys, specially rich boys like him, who always liked to play with girls, change girls like dresses, but he only thought of Eva.
As Vincent was sleeping, I decided to leave him alone and go down to ensure everyone that he’s alright. I placed Vincent’s head on the pillow and moved to get out of the bed.
Suddenly I gasped when Vincent grabbed my arm and pulled me roughly towards him. He held me tight as he bore his face on my waist.
He was sleeping holding me tightly as if I was going to evaporate if he left me. I looked at him carefully.
He was indeed a very attractive man, tall lean, with beautiful proportioned body. His black hair was silky, straight and his face was perfect. I felt like fainting, staring at him.
If we met in other situation, maybe I would have fallen for him. He was indeed very handsome and intimating.
Woah woah! Jennie…… hold your horses…… what the f*** are you thinking!!!!!!
He is your bully!!!!!
I tried to wiggle off his hold. I was just about to get out off bed. He pulled me back and I fell beside him.
I was instantly cocooned by his warm embrace. I felt the roughness of his hand on my arm, and gave me a sense of protection.
” Where are you going?” He said squinting his eyes as he couldn’t open his eyes properly, due to continuous crying plus he just got up from his sleep.
” I…… I” I don’t know why but I froze, my voice stuck on my throat.
” So you will also leave me like her!?
What!?
” Please atleast you don’t leave me…… I need you to stay with me…… please accept me.”
What is he saying?
” Don’t go…… stay with me…… please. I don’t feel right.” He pulled me in his embrace and ducked my head on his chest.
After 1 hour……
I went down and everybody was looking at me with rays of hope. I smiled at them and Emma reached towards me.
” How’s Vincent!?…… what happened to your hand…… dress.!? Why are you drenched!?? You are bleeding!?” Emma shrieked.
I almost forgot that I had cut on my palms and legs, and I was drenched.
” Uh…… it’s a long story…” I bit my lips due to nervousness.
” I am sorry Jennie, you had so much to endure because of me.” Emma started crying, Xavier held her.
” Hey it’s okay! I am fine and he’s too. Situation is under control now!” I tried to confront her.
Rose reached me with a towel and ruffled my hair. Harper was observing me quietly.
” Vincent is not like that… he used be a good and kind boy. Everything changed after she left him, I can’t even get my old brother back” Emma cried covering her face.
” I didn’t even know when he started to get depressed…… when he started to act like this. I want my old Vincent back” Emma was crying heavily now.
I could never imagine of a person thinking of suicide or self harming, feeling so depressed.
Vincent had his own fight which I never knew until now. He’d always been trapped in his world, with no way out, dealing with his version of reality the only way he knew. Now I understood what Blake and Emma meant to me.
” Hey Emma! Please don’t cry! I promise I will help you with this. I… I… am ready to help Vincent to get out from his depression”
” What!?” Harper, Rose and Xavier said in chorus.
Did I say something unusual!?
” Really you will help Vincent!?” Emma eyes shone with hope.
” Ye…… Yes. Yes of course! I will help him with his…… depression.”
“What! You are not! Are you mad?” Harper jumped in.
” Harper…… it’s her choice, don’t always dominate her in everything.” Rose whined.
” Ow you shut your mouth! I can’t watch her die. Look at her!? She looks like a voodoo doll already!!” Harper scanned me with anger and I gulped.
” Harper, Vincent is not like you think. He has suffered on the inside and he wanted to escape from his darkness. I just want to help him”
” I just want to show him the way, I can’t help him completely but I can reduce it. Come on Harper, there is no harm in just helping? ” I pouted at her.
” Yeah Harper! We are not saying her to replace Eva. We are just saying her to be with us, so he can feel her presence and calm down, that’s it.” Rose said.
” But-”
” Please Harper, for humanity sake.”
” Fine! But whatever dangerous happens to her, I swear on you people she will quit right away!!” Harper eyes blazed up.
” Okay! Okay! ” Rose chirped and pulled us together for a hug.
This was it. I was going to help Vincent, and there was no turning back.
Did I make a right decision?
Vincent POV
” Ahh…… my head” I held my head while getting up.
My room was all messed up, all my things scattered here and there, and my headache was giving me life threatening pain.
I did it again didn’t I !!!?
I DON’T F***ING UNDERSTAND!!!!
Everything I touch, I destroy.
Everything I see, I destroy.
WHY DO I F***ING LIVE!!!!!?
I held my head tight, feeling the pain. My head feels like I am going to f***ing explode, and I can’t deal with that suffocating tension.
What happened yesterday!?……
I held my head and closed my eyes. My eyes widened with shock!
Jennie!!!Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.
She was here!!!!!
She was f***ing here!!